McCain Puts Lipstick on Pig, PETA Protests
Barack Obama’s famous “pig in lipstick” quote has sparked a major investigation of the McCain/Palin ticket. Ingrid Newkirk, international president of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), told a Washington press conference on Monday,
“We have compelling evidence to believe that Senator McCain has subjected many pigs to heartless makeovers. The one that Senator Obama insinuated was the only reported case. We know that wild pigs are indigenous North Vietnam, so probably hundreds of other pigs have suffered silently. If our world is ever going to be truly eco-friendly, we must stop vigilante animal testing.”
Of course, there is no way to tell exactly how many pigs were affected. Governor Sarah Palin defends her running mate’s environmental and ethical integrity.
“If I may ask again: What’s the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick. John was only trying to elevate a pig’s rank in society through a sacred cosmetic bridge. We will get these pigs back on their feet and become functioning members of society. They will be community organizers; they will be moms. Lipstick will turn pigs into humans, just like in Animal Farm. But, of course, without all the goddamn communists.”
Some PETA members are already acting out. Instead of dumping the usual bucket of red paint, they are catapulting balloons filled with Revlon foundation at the White House. They have formed a picket line around the Washington Monument holding up this sign:
Senator McCain has only commented: “I’m not President Clinton. You don’t have to worry about me getting in trouble with a pig in lipstick.”
Four days before the infamous “lipstick on a pig” remark by Sen. Obama, Gov. Sarah Palin was depicted as the lipstick-wearing porcine embodiment of “Federal Budget Earmarks” in a St. Louis Post-Dispatch cartoon.
http://www.caglepost.com/cartoon/RJ+Matson/55007/Lipstick-COLOR.html
Did the Obama campaign see this political satire and work into Obama’s speech? Of course they did.
It’s time to replace the presidential debates with a competition involving putting lipstick on a pig. Does the candidate forcefully apply the lipstick, or try to sternly negotiate with the pig..?